Recovery-Update 12
Last night was tough. We maybe slept a total of 4 hours. Just getting up to go to the restroom ~12 feet away took anywhere from 35 minutes to an hour from getting up to getting back into the bed and comfortable to fall asleep again - the pain caused by managing the chest tubes is just terrible. Sometimes they slip and jerk or fill with fluid making them heavier, all of which means they cause more pain. I was having to REALLY focus on what I was doing since I was so groggy having been pulled out of a deep sleep. It was a little scary being trying to snap out of my daze while managing her tubes. Sometimes I'm not sure if I'm causing more pain than I'm helping.
Once 4 am rolled around there was no getting back to sleep with blood pressure monitoring tech, xray technician, nurse shift change and doctor rounds. They're all necessary, it just makes getting rest difficult. Katie seemed geared up and ready to go at 6:30 AM. I asked if we could go back to sleep so she obliged until she woke up again at 6:40. Ok...let's get going. Ordered breakfast and then went for a lap around the floor. This lap was more difficult than yesterdays laps but Katie is driven to get well so we can go home.
When we got back to the room after her lap around the floor we figured it'd be good for her to sit in the recliner. We reclined her and this turned out to be a bad idea. She was in more pain than she had been in a day or more. The nurse gave her some pain meds in addition to the epidural and helped us move her to the bed. That's where we're at. She's just about asleep.
The surgeon's physician assistant (PA) said once her tubes come out it'd be a day or two before she could go home. Katie and I think the extra day in the ICU set us back a day on the total days in the hospital. The cardiologist was encouraging. Her blood pressure has been wonderful. Of course that's with medication but he said it looks great. If it's like that without the medication she may be able to drop blood pressure meds all together for good! Something else to pray for. We knew this would be a possibility but was told it'd be something we might see over the course of the first year.
I was originally planning to try and stay another night here but I'm exhausted and will be here all day. Marcia said she could stay the night and I'm thinking I'll take her up on it. I feel bad about that though. I feel I should be next to Katie at every opportunity. Even with Elena's birth it wasn't this draining. She and I haven't been through something like this before. I think I'm realizing I need to start "running" this like a marathon and not so much like a sprint. It's hard. I want to be here.
I'm learning so much about suffering and I think God is giving much more of a heart of compassion through this experience. I'm thankful we didn't fully understand the depths of this pain when we signed up for it! I thought about that during a trip to the restroom last night that was particularly painful. I also thought of Jesus, and being who he is, fully understood the depth of the pain he would feel on the cross and the depth of how alone he would feel when God had to turn from him because of all the sin that was laid on him. It means so much more to me to think about the anguish he felt when he asked God, if there was any other way, let's do the other way. And yet, still, he willingly laid himself down. I pray Lord that this suffering would produce perseverance, character and hope in both Katie and I - though I do not count my "suffering" AT ALL to what she is going through.
Once 4 am rolled around there was no getting back to sleep with blood pressure monitoring tech, xray technician, nurse shift change and doctor rounds. They're all necessary, it just makes getting rest difficult. Katie seemed geared up and ready to go at 6:30 AM. I asked if we could go back to sleep so she obliged until she woke up again at 6:40. Ok...let's get going. Ordered breakfast and then went for a lap around the floor. This lap was more difficult than yesterdays laps but Katie is driven to get well so we can go home.
When we got back to the room after her lap around the floor we figured it'd be good for her to sit in the recliner. We reclined her and this turned out to be a bad idea. She was in more pain than she had been in a day or more. The nurse gave her some pain meds in addition to the epidural and helped us move her to the bed. That's where we're at. She's just about asleep.
The surgeon's physician assistant (PA) said once her tubes come out it'd be a day or two before she could go home. Katie and I think the extra day in the ICU set us back a day on the total days in the hospital. The cardiologist was encouraging. Her blood pressure has been wonderful. Of course that's with medication but he said it looks great. If it's like that without the medication she may be able to drop blood pressure meds all together for good! Something else to pray for. We knew this would be a possibility but was told it'd be something we might see over the course of the first year.
I was originally planning to try and stay another night here but I'm exhausted and will be here all day. Marcia said she could stay the night and I'm thinking I'll take her up on it. I feel bad about that though. I feel I should be next to Katie at every opportunity. Even with Elena's birth it wasn't this draining. She and I haven't been through something like this before. I think I'm realizing I need to start "running" this like a marathon and not so much like a sprint. It's hard. I want to be here.
I'm learning so much about suffering and I think God is giving much more of a heart of compassion through this experience. I'm thankful we didn't fully understand the depths of this pain when we signed up for it! I thought about that during a trip to the restroom last night that was particularly painful. I also thought of Jesus, and being who he is, fully understood the depth of the pain he would feel on the cross and the depth of how alone he would feel when God had to turn from him because of all the sin that was laid on him. It means so much more to me to think about the anguish he felt when he asked God, if there was any other way, let's do the other way. And yet, still, he willingly laid himself down. I pray Lord that this suffering would produce perseverance, character and hope in both Katie and I - though I do not count my "suffering" AT ALL to what she is going through.
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